My puppy This!, is one year old this week. She has some amazing skills. We have also had some challenges. I want to take off the social media “lens” for a minute and get real with the video below.
I’ve seen a lot of words floating around recently like… “exhausted”, “anxious”, “overwhelmed”, “pressure”, “perfectionism”.
And I get it.
There’s a lot going on in the world right now, and so many of us are emotionally taxed… sometimes, we are just trying to make it through the day.
Several times over the last few weeks, I’ve been asked the same question from friends, from students, from people reaching out through a message to me.
The same question: How can I stop feeling like I’m so far behind that I’m lost?
So I started preparing the video above, and in the midst of preparing it, I was sent a letter asking the same question once again. I hope this video helps you realize you’re not alone. We’re all in this together, doing the best we can, one day at a time.
It may be something that may help you find your path again. It may be something a friend who is struggling in silence needs to hear.
Don’t look at what everyone else is doing. Look at where you were last week, give yourself grace, and celebrate where you are today.
Birthday Girl, This!
Over the past year, I’ve shared what This! and I are working on and our progress in many episodes of our Shaped by Dog podcast. If you have resource guarding or your dog is worried about certain things, there will be a podcast episode to help. You can listen or watch and get the transcript for every episode.
In episode 66, “Resource Guarding: Dog vs Dog Aggression“, I covered how I was helping This!, and then did a follow-up in episode 71 about how I journaled This!’s resource guarding and why it helped fast track success. The follow-up episode is called “Pro Dog Trainer’s Secret to Help Your Naughty Dog“.
In episode 29, I shared how things that are different for our dogs can see them react. So, if that is a challenge you have, “Understanding and Preventing Reactivity and Aggression in Your Dog” will help. You will also want to check out episode 88, “Barrier Frustration: Help for Fence Fighting, Leash Reactivity and Window Guarding“, for actionable strategies.
We’re now at over 100 episodes of Shaped by Dog, so no matter what your challenge, there will be help if you look through the podcast index. There are also several hundred blog posts here for you on many topics. You can use the search feature here and also on my podcast.
The single most important thing that I would like everyone to know is that there can be a better tomorrow for you and your dog.
Consistent effort, daily, is going to take you to an amazing place.
So, happy first birthday to the Schitt’s Creek Bébés! This!’s sister Dream is visiting, so we had two puppies for a birthday photoshoot. Momentum stood in for her daughter Swish, and Tater Salad happily stood in for Mission.
Today I am grateful for This! and all the dogs in my life, and to you for wanting to make a better tomorrow for the dogs in your life.
Thank you for this amazing video 😍 this is what I needed. I am this kind of person that constantly compare myself to others, especially on Instagram, where people constantly post videos of the training that made me sad. I have the impression that I am far behind, even though I make progress all the time, However your video is very inspiring and the Susan Garrett’s team very supportive. I am trying not to forget how far we have went. What I noticed, is that for me, it is better not to look at Instagram for too long and only look for the inspiring lessons.
Thank you once again.
Kasia
I adopted a 3 year old short haired border collie/ heeler cross. She is the most challenging dog I have ever had in the house. My dogs were always welcoming to visiting dogs and seemed to fit into the house fairly easily. Arrow had been through a lot the month before I got her. When I picked up at the rescue store front she was frantic, She was running from cat cage to cat cage AND SUPER STRESSED.
I had asked if she was a good traveler. Which she has been. I purchased your Home School your Dog Program and binge listened to your podcasts. I have and 8 year old border Collie. He is big and sweet to all dogs. I got crate as soon as possible. I live in a 700 square foot house, Arrow was a jealous creature and attacked Charlie often. She was crazy on the end of a leash pulling and loosing her poop at every squirrel. Search is and amazing Walking where there were no squirrels was not always an option as we live in the middle of a forest and squirrel heaven. Lots of treats…. good ones. She was very hungry ravenous would describe her better . I say thank goodness for you Susan. There were so many times I was ready to quit but persevered . She also had some separation anxiety. I work shift work . So feeding times were varied. Lots of small training with both dogs separately. Taught Arrow the words away and crate when I saw her body language escalating TEMP. She would give Charlie some space then and not attack the poor guy. It was challenging times. I kept Arrow on leash and Charlie helped desensitize her by barking you can’t get me now sigh. With games of search when encountering squirrels and Charlie and rewarding the quiet in the house.
I used Rescue Remedy for pets ( Bach flower essences) and homeopathic remedies for stress and anxiety in dogs, I am a Reiki Master so lot of Reilki energy. In my imperfection I turned her loose which as crazy as it sounds worked in our favor. It was a long time before she barked at the door,. Things improved between the dogs . No recall except on a long rope or in a fenced dog park.
I trusted my gut feeling with Arrow. She is really smart and did want to learn. We did sit before we go in and out the door and waiting for dinner until released. Fast forward 3 month and she is sleeping off leash on the deck. We are were at a family function with 4 other dogs Easter weekend. She was pretty amazing. She just to had to go to the crate once. She is the fun police. Charlie is not supposed to have fun LOL.
We went on two off leash walks in an unfamiliar place and Arrow stayed close, One was for two hours and she stayed close. She was a good house guest. When I packed the car this morning she was off leash and she stayed close . She is finally settled. We are right around the 3 month mark and we still have lots to work on . We have made so much progress. THank you for the great information
What a great reminder to focus on the positive experiences we encounter each day rather than our less-than-perfect results. Susan gives great advice to simply do our best each day — that is all that is required!
What a great reminder to focus on the positive experiences we encounter each day rather than our less-than-perfect results. Susan gives great advice to simply do our best each day — that is all that is required!
I so needed to find this today. Thank you Susan, now I can brush myself off, give my hound a cuddle, and get on with her training. We will get there, and if we don’t, well it doesn’t really matter, we are a team and we’re okay.
I loved the video very informational I’ll try not to compare the front door to the back door yeah thanks for the video very helpful keep up the good work…….
Thank you, Susan. I can’t tell you how I’ve struggled with feeling inadequate, and that my rescue dog is too damaged to succeed. Thank you x
Jan. 2022 and still bringing tears.! Thank you This and Susan, during a week when we’re ready to quit two dog sports (my boy is 3+ years). Two sports that I love, but have never had the success that we should be able to achieve. But Home School the dog late in 2021 has given us work–you always say confidence is the most important, but relationship and confidence in relationship is what we’ve most enjoyed and gained from our HSD sessions. Tonight, bitterly cold, we worked in the basement on our break and hop it up skills. That naughty 3 y.o.–he sat quietly, without a restraint, waiting his turn while I worked my older dog 3 ft. away. That is AMAZING. And yes, better than last week.
So maybe we won’t get to our UD or UDX or MACH in 3 years, but he does now come when called (mostly) and I’ve learned how to train better and have some new tools to deploy, and faith and confidence that’s new.
Thank you. and we’ll keep working.
This made me tear up with so many emotions. Thank you for creating a video that I can share with friends and fellow dog lovers that always seem to want to compare their amazing animals to someone else. So much of the journey with their dogs is not appreciated and enjoyed
I have a dog who is turning 3 on Jan 1. I had big plans when I got him and there are many reasons why I have fallen short but watching your video has reminded me to continue on the the path I wanted to go on and along the way, to stop peeking in at everyone’s front door. Thank you Susan, I appreciate you. Merry Christmas.
Thank you Susan for this and all the post I’ve been watching this weekend. I have a very high energy border collie that I have not do a great job training at agility. And I have the scare marks to prove it!
Beau and I are going to make it thanks to you and your encouragement, Thanks.
I needed to hear this today. Thank you for sharing such a valuable insight. Made me cry!
Ms. Susan Garrett!
Thanks for this post.
I marvel that you have had to deal with so many challenges with your puppy This!
My rescue dog Milton, whom I obtained two years ago, has learned so much. We know the basics of Recallers. Milton is a good crate dog.
One more round (Q3), and Milton will earn the AKC Rally Novice title! Thank goodness for virtual titles!
Milton is a joy to take out in public, and is welcome in most any retail establishment. I get a lot of compliments on his nice behavior. He loves car rides and doesn’t mind the vet.
What is wrong, you may ask, and why do I take him out in public so much? Well, Milton has separation anxiety. He has trauma in his background, having been abandoned in a back yard.
The training for separation anxiety is counter-intuitive for most trainers. I doubt the average person understands much about it, nor wants to know.
But we are making progress — finally — again. For a long time, it felt like we were stuck at the same level in the game “Candy Crush”, and couldn’t advance. I felt as if I was consigned to spend the rest of our days in a land where candy canes shattered, lemon drops popped, and chocolate M & M’s melted off the smartphone screen.
But one thing I will say is, though I have felt like a prisoner in my own home (I am single), it’s not too different a feeling than others are experiencing during this pandemic.
I am so grateful for Milton and what he has taught me.
And by the way, I can see that Milton is making more good choices. In fact the first separation anxiety trainer I engaged told me it was important for my dog to make good choices. I bet Susan would approve of her. I just know it!
Thank you, this has helped enormously. We have made progress but it’s not linear. Today Oscar was nearly perfect, then because he was tired and wanted to go home, he nipped a friend of ours who was stood nearby who we were talking to. Couldn’t have happened to a worse person as he’s not the worlds most dog-friendly person. I really thought we were making in-roads but now I’m disappointed this has happened and I feel rubbish. I spend so much time with him but I’m obviously not doing the right things. I just wish I didn’t feel so rubbish; I know he’s better with us than anyone and others would have given up on him. But I do have to remind myself that he is better with us, I know that in my heart, even if we’re not perfect, we’re better and more patient than most.
Hi Susan and crew.
What a great video. Thank you for your frankness, and your telling of the truth. Social media can be so hard because you do see all those front doors (maybe not knowing that they are only the front ones). I love that you have reminded me that ‘it is/has to be ok’ and to give myself grace. I am just learning how to set a goal. I think this video will help me immensely as it is reminding me to just look at myself last week, see how far I have come and to take that one step, each day. This is really going to help me from getting overwhelmed and just doing what I can do in a consistent, forward-looking manner.
Sending much gratitude your way.
Colette Budge
thankyou!
Thank you for your response to my email.
This is so the story of my life! I’m not a first time owner, I’ve loved training before but this time I’m failing completely. It’s so frustrating to put down all that effort and get nothing. I keep having thoughts that I’m not good enough for this dog, that I should give him back – the fun has gone.
I needed this today. Tessa, my AussieDoodle, and I have come a long way, but still have such a long way to go. We got a late start, but Tessa improves a little every day, and sometimes I struggle to remember to look back at how far we’ve come, and to give us both grace.
Each time I watch one of Susan’s videos, I feel like I learn something profound. Thank you Susan, for taking your time to make the world a better place for us and our dogs.
Just thank you!! ❤
Thank you Susan for sharing your challenges with This! My 16 month old boy has similar things for us to work through and knowing you do also is a “ maybe I am not doing it all wrong” revelation. The implied blame I have received and the self blame is a struggle I have to go through, but like you, I refuse to use punitive training methods. We are progressing and I will be happy with that.
Wow. That hit the spit. Thank you for sharing this
Wonderful post. Applicable to so much in life. Thank you.
My girl Beau amazes me every day. When I think that we are not progressing and I am not doing right by her, she does something which puts a smile on my face and encourages me to keep going. Yes, its a struggle to keep going every day. The pressure to have to train everyday or deal with the guilt weighs heavy. But having a day off, she comes back stronger, does the task better. Susan, I dont know how to thank you for all that you give. Your passions, your knowledge, your emotions, your kindness and support, all contribute to my dogs life and to mine. We thank you ….. (Happy Birthday This!)
Awesome! Shared to my news feed!!
Thank You!
Possibly your most relevant video for me. It’s taking time – and I know that’s partly because I’m trying to work with two dogs at the same time. (We don’t have a lot of indoor space and it rains a lot in the UK. Crating one or putting him/her upstairs would, I think, result in less attention from the one I’m working with, and certainly a lot of noise (in one case) and increased jealousy between them. (They play well together but sneak toys away from each other and he’s always pushy for attention. He’s fifteen months, she’s a year older; both JRT crosses but very different: Smidgeon is Yorkie cross and Ruff’s part dachshund.)
We acquired Ruff after our fifteen-year old Staffie died and he’s a challenge. We had little chance to socialise him during lockdown – no puppy clases and the local park was closed, but looking now at where we were a year ago, there is definite progress. And thinking back to our last small terrier – and even the lovely old soppy Staffie, there’s no comparison.
So I’ll keep taking the tablets and applying their Hot Spot and IYC towards the behaviours I’m hoping for. Even if we never get there, we’re a darn sight closer than I’ve ever been with my (numerous) dogs.
I get it! I can relate to some of that. My dogs are 3 and 6. They get along ok but only because the older one is so neutral and young is pushy. I have the same issues with wheeatr and only one small space to work wiith them.No fenced yard and no dog parks. And I think I will also start to put one upstairs. Little socialization for the 3 year old since the winter before Covid (we did an obedience class but you know what winters are like – socked in, cold rain, and I don’t have a house where other dogs could come) Then Covid hit. I am so glad Susan talked about some effect. I’m sure it made a difference to my 3 year old. She’s leash reactive and not super comfortable in busy noisy exciting environments:( Reacts to being startled sometimes. Good luck.
I found Susan just over a year ago & I remember the first time doing Hot Zone in a masterclass thinking oh my god! How will I ever teach my dogs to sit calmly on an evening & not steal my food. Now on an evening they go to their beds as soon as they see I have food & sit calmly. I have a long way to go with reactivity with 2 of them. One barks at dogs on the other side of the fence which is hard to predict as you can’t see through or over the fence & another barks & lunges at other people & dogs when on walks (getting slightly better with this one but still long way to go) but what a difference a year has made just doing masterclasses, crate games & HSTD. Thank you Susan!
At the beginning of 2020 we were given (unasked for) a golden retriever puppy who had no bite inhibition whatsoever and constantly play bit our arms and hands. Totally uncontrollable. Today we have a gentle, funny, biddable almost two year old wonderful companion dog who has claimed our hearts completely…We also rescued an English Shepherd a few months ago with fear aggression issues and dog to dog aggression. She is now calm and happy and best of friends with our Golden…they play together, nap together and share all toys. Susan, without Home School the Dog and all of your other resources, this NEVER could have happened. We are so grateful, and so are our dogs. We tell everyone we can about you and your kind and concerned positive approach to helping dogs be the best they can be. Thank you1
Thanks, so much for the video! Scout will be 13 weeks tomorrow. We’re learned a lot and we have a long way to go. But I believe we will get to where CCD we need to be.
Thank you Susan, I needed this to keep me going. (I had tears in my eyes too)
Susan you are awesome. Thank you sooo much for your encouragement. I needed that. I wish you lived near me. I need to surround myself with positive people.
My Lilibit is one year old tomorrow. This hasn’t not been the year I planned but she has made this a beautiful year.
It is us. She is my confidant, buddy, and my dog. I’m her human.
She knows her yard and we are able to be outside without a leash. Small agility course in the house and yard. I’m so proud of her and the work we’ve been able to do. THANK YOU. Lilibit is getting her Recall and her leash work is better too. Goals are my sanity. Covid sucks.
I so appreciate you’re much needed encouragement!
I love your videos and I wish you lived next door! What the world needs right now is more people like you! Many thanks!
Thank you for this…and happy birthday, This! I have been feeling all of it. But Keeva is better today than yesterday. And she’s sweet and happy and fun. And that matters. So thanks ❤️